Santa's Beard

A non-christmassy but also christmassy TMBG rock tune that I never know when to listen to.

Listening to songs with “Santa” in them outside of the usual Christmastime designated season feels odd. Not having jingle bell sounds in a rock song referencing Santa coming out of your speakers during Christmastime is also a challenge. It’s as if this song is cock-blocking itself from being enjoyed for the rock and roll good time that it is.

The 12th song off the Lincoln album from They Might Be Giants is “Santa’s Beard.” An upbeat number about a man whose significant other may be stepping out with his friend. It also seems to be happening predominantly (if not exclusively) while the friend is dressed as Santa Claus.

I saw my baby wearing Santa’s beard

She kissed him once and whispered in his ear

I saw my baby wearing Santa’s beard

I wish he would go

He’s breaking up my home.

Misdeads Under the Mistletoe.

There is a song that I have begun to enjoy in a new light because of Santa’s Beard. What if this song and “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Clause” existed in the same universe? What if the little girls singing that song, had snuck downstairs and witnessed her mommy kissing Santa and it wasn’t her dad under the suit but instead was her daddy’s friend? Now we’ve got ourselves a deliciously drama-filled tale.

I have no hard feelings toward this track. It’s not a favorite but it does live on my “These Xmas Songs Don’t Suck” playlist. I do want to sit down with the man singing us the tale and help him with his relationship though. This guy just needs to have some open communication and talk about healthy boundaries with his partner.

My wife is an autonomous person who I trust. If she sat on a friend’s lap (who was dressed as Santa at a Christmas party), I would trust her emphatically. I might feel a little uncomfortable with my friend’s eagerness to get her up on his lap but I’m not that insecure. I know how to appropriately have conversations about boundaries that I may need in a friendship but I don’t think sitting on laps and sharing a kiss at a Christmas party indicate a relationship that is about to implode. But maybe that’s because we’ve had healthy conversations about each others’ needs and boundaries and we each work to keep those for one another.

Redefining Christmas Music

I suppose "Santa’s Beard" is more than a quirky rock tune but also a lens through which I can examine the masks I’ve worn (or more aptly) have seen be worn in relationships. The song’s narrative is filled with humor and betrayal, which serves as holding a mirror up to the complexities and drama in our personal interactions.

"Santa’s Beard" contrasts the idyllic scenes indicative of Christmas music and invites us to ask “What IS holiday music?” It challenges the norms and encourages a more inclusive soundtrack that can resonate with a broader range of experiences and emotions, year-round. I take back what I said at the beginning. This deserves to be played year-round.