Toddler Hiway – A 25-Second Nostalgia Bomb

The words in this post will greatly outnumber the words in this 25 second song.

"Toddler Hiway" is a short song. Twenty-five seconds of John Flansburgh and John Linnell using nothing but their voices (get out of here, instruments!) and just 38 words, creating a whimsical piece of music that captures the essence of early childhood joy. They say a picture’s worth a thousand words, so I guess this song clocks in at around 1,038 words, give or take?

For me, "Toddler Hiway" is a no-skip song—not only because it’s great, but because by the time I even think about skipping, the song is over. Very clever, guys. The foresight they had to imagine a future with a “skip” button when they wrote this? Chef’s kiss.

The Gift That Keeps On Giving (For 25 Seconds)

The song feels like a little gift—it comes and goes like an Easter lily on a Pacific Northwest hike (I’m assuming. I don’t hike. There are bears out there). Considering its short life span, let’s break it down, lyric by lyric, because even in 25 seconds, They Might Be Giants manage to pack in a lot of fun and nostalgia.

A Look at the Lyrics (and the Memories They Bring)

"In the mornin' sun 'round seven o'clock
The parking lot fills around Toys-Я-Us"

Up until my teenage years, my grandma would take me to Toys-Я-Us on my birthday. She’d walk me through the store, and I could pick out one big thing or a couple of smaller things. I only remember a few of my picks—mostly He-Man figures for a while, then Ninja Turtles, and eventually Nintendo games—but the real gift was the trip itself. This lyric immediately takes me back to those mornings, waking up on my birthday and knowing I was going to spend the day with my grandma at the toy mecca that was Toys-Я-Us.

"And my little girl, she will get away"

If you’ve ever taken small kids to a toy store (or anywhere with a toy aisle), you know the primal urge that takes over. They’re hit with this pure, unfettered joy, and then they’re off. They’ve got to touch everything. It’s like a toy aisle adrenaline rush. As they get older, they’ll ask if they can go to the toy section ahead of you, and you’ll suddenly remember that the guy who hosted America’s Most Wanted had his son kidnapped from the toy section of a Wal-Mart in Florida. So you tell them “no,” and go with them every time, until they’re about 14 or 15 and you finally learn to chill out. (They’ll be fine. Probably.)

"Ride her bike down Toddler Hiway"

I always remember seeing kids in the bike aisle of Toys-Я-Us, hopping on those Big Wheel tricycles and zooming around like it was their own personal racetrack. I learned to read pretty early on, and by Kindergarten, I was better at it than most kids I knew. So, naturally, I never got on those bikes. Why? Because I could read the signs that said not to. It wasn’t allowed! As a 6-year-old, I remember thinking that those other kids’ parents must not be able to read like I could. The bike aisle always felt like a block party—kids tearing around on bikes, ignoring store rules, and wreaking havoc while their parents chatted. This lyric is Flansburgh’s little girl making her big getaway down the aisles of toddler lawlessness.

"Take your Close'n'Play"

Okay, honesty time. Until today, I had always sung this line as, “Take your clothes and play.” You know, like parents reminding their kids that they have to get dressed before they go out to play. It wasn’t until I looked up the lyrics for this post that I learned it’s actually “Close'n'Play,” which is a record player for kids from the ‘70s. I had one of these in the early ‘80s! So, of course, if you’re going to join the bike aisle tailgate party, don’t forget to bring your Close’n’Play to blast some tunes.

"Toddler Hiway"

This final lyric just makes me smile. Whether my interpretation of the song is accurate or not, these are the memories and feelings it stirs up for me every time I hear it. In just 25 seconds, They Might Be Giants manage to pull me right back into that world of childhood excitement and joy. The fun harmonies and nostalgic vibes are just too good to skip.

Final Thoughts

"Toddler Hiway" may be short, but it’s filled with so much charm and whimsy that it sticks with you long after those 25 seconds are up. Whether it takes you back to birthday toy shopping, bike aisle chaos, or just fills you with a sense of youthful joy, it’s a song that’s impossible to resist.

What does this song make you think of? Any childhood memories tied to it? And, seriously—how many He-Man figures did you own? Tell me about it! Leave a comment below.

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