Extra Savior-Faire: I Don’t Know How to Write This One
Flansburgh wrote it on a ukulele. I wrote this in emotional shambles. TMBG’s “Extra Savoir-Faire,” false confidence, and the mess of showing up anyway.
First off, thank you to everyone who shared nice comments this week or sent me a DM. Whether I was able to reply or not, each one was received, appreciated, and felt.
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I’ve been trying to figure out how to write about this song for the last few days. My wife is embarking on a journey of self-discovery, one that’s putting time and space between us. My emotions have been heavy. Writing about a song named for having the ability to act or speak appropriately during social situations has felt ironically impossible. For the last 48 hours, I would say that I have zero savior-faire.
Extra Savoir-Faire is track seven on John Henry, and it’s a chill, horn-filled little number written by John Flansburgh on his wife’s upside-down ukulele (he’s left-handed). It’s also got some of his best falsetto vocals on the album, which gives the song an air of highbrow flair that perfectly matches the ego of its narrator. It’s a chill vibes song.
This song has the unique distinction of having taught me what “savoir-faire” even means: loosely, “knowing how to act.” When I first heard it, I immediately thought of the Kids in the Hall sketch “The Best Looking Man in the World.”1 I've always considered both of them to be about the same kind of guy: the one who has absolutely no business being as confident as he is, and yet, somehow, it works out for him anyway.
I never related to that kind of guy. Especially not now. I knew a few of them in school. And in comedy. Loud, performative confidence with no real depth. Guys who act like they’ve got extra savoir-faire when really, it’s just hubris and swagger.
This post is messy. I know that. But so is my life right now. Maybe that’s the real savoir-faire; showing up with the truth when everything feels sideways. Flansy wrote this song while strumming his wife’s uke upside-down. Maybe this is me doing the same.
Take care. See you next week.
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From Kids In The Hall:
Sorry about the rough patch! This is song is how I learned about savoir-faire too :)
I know what it’s like to try and be creative and witty when life leaves you feeling the exact opposite of that. I hope you find a sense of equanimity soon.
I think of this song as another brilliant takedown of the blowhard male ego. Also, Flansie’s vocals are so wonderful on this. Maybe one of his all-time best.
The Johns really don’t get the accolades they deserve for their vocal ranges.